how fast is change

it all seems so far way. those feelings that were so strong at one time now seem to all just fade away. all the pain and the sadness all those horrible thoughts that go though your head. everything that you thought you would never understand, the feelings that seemed as if they would never go way. looking at the faces and hearing the stories knowing those same feelings and how close it may have been to being you. thinking of people saying all those things about you. never being able to understand or change what had happened wondering if they could have changed something some may even blame them selfs. some may be lost and going crazy trying to find the answer when really they is not one. nothing would have changed it no feeling would make that feeling go away. the bottom line is you could do everything say all the right things and it might not ever make a diff. you just have to hope and pray that in the end you did something right.